About Me

I craft. I pick up after people. I watch tv. I bake. I pretend to go running a few times a week. I knit. I watch Sesame Street with my son, and unfortunately know exactly what Elmo’s thinking about today. I whine. I cook. I can’t say “mitten” or “button” without getting laughed at. I write. I pretty much do it all, you could say.

Here’s 100 things about me:

1. I am in (secret) love with America’s Next Top Model, Beauty and the Geek, Intervention, and The Hills.

2. The middle finger on my right hand is double-jointed. It’s gross.

3. I have two siblings- an older brother who lives in Maine and a younger sister who lives in Pennsylvania (and is due with her first baby in 3 days!). Yes, I am the middle child, and all the rumors are true.

4. Though Jeff and I met in high school and were good friends, we didn’t actually start dating until 4 years after we’d graduated.

5. I love banana bread. I hate bananas.

6. I have a tattoo of a butterfly on my right shoulder. It is covering up a tattoo of another, much smaller butterfly.

7. I am DEATHLY afraid of butterflies. (Actually, I’m scared of most things with wings.)

8. Yes, I know I have a tattoo of one. But it’s on my back, I can’t see it. Perhaps I did this as a (FAILED) way of conquering my fear?

9. I once tagged an underpass with a friend.

10. I detest mushrooms.

11. Growing up, we had a rabbit named Thumper, and a video of him was one of four finalist videos on America’s Funniest Home Videos in the early ’90’s. We won $1000. In the video, Thumper dealt cards. Seriously. (Also, could I say ‘video’ one more time?)

12. When I was little, I was convinced that I’d come from Mars, and I told this to anyone who would listen.

13. I keep my glasses in my purse, sans case. This literally HURTS Jeff. Needless to say, they are pretty scratched up.

14. I can read and watch TV/movies at the same time.

15. I can only fall asleep at night if I lie on my stomach. Needless to say, I did not sleep at all during both of my pregnancies.

16. I could eat turkey sandwiches every day and never tire of them.

17. I can quote the movie Home Alone from start to finish.

18. I stole a jawbreaker from my brother when I was in third grade, and later confessed through sobs to my mom because I thought I was going to go to JAIL for my crime.

19. I had to memorize The Pledge of Allegiance in French in 7th grade (something every loyal Francophone should know…). I can still recite it.

20. I have lived in 7 states and 2 countries.

21. I have yet to ever find a personalized item (keychains, pencils, stickers, etc.) in a store with my name on it. I always check.

22. I hate the word “loaf”.

23. When I was in first grade, my class went to a taping of the Bozo the Clown show. I got to meet him. He called me “Banana Head.”

24. I wish I had more patience. Especially with my almost-3-year-old.

25. I find it difficult to sleep at night if the towels in the linen closet are not all folded the same, uniform way.

26. The very first movie I ever saw in a theater was Oliver & Co.

27. I LOVE to knit, and find it impossible to sit through a TV show or a movie without knitting something.

28. I’ve had my ears pierced countless times (most at one time: 4 holes in one ear), my eyebrow pierced once, my belly button pierced (by friends, with a needle and an ice cube, OUCH) once, and my tongue pierced twice. All that remains are the ear piercings, and I’m down to just one hole per ear.

29. I smoked a cigarette once in my whole life.

30. I can’t stand long showers. Get in, get out; any longer is a waste of time and water.

31. I helped to start a short-lived lacrosse club at my high school.

32. I was a Girl Scout for many years. I loved the uniform.

33. I can’t whistle.

34. I would consider being made to eat creamed corn punishment for something Very Bad.

35. My first car was an ’89 Ford Escort (this was in ’99), whom I called Peter. Peter was never a very reliable car. One time while I was driving, one of his wheels fell off. No joke.

36. I used to eat peanut butter and brown sugar sandwiches all the time when I was little. Then: Mmm. Now: Bleh?

37. I had braces for 2 years.

38. The first CD I ever bought was Green Day “Dookie”.

39. I was a die-hard NKOTB fan. (Joey was my favorite.) I even, along with 6 friends, entered the talent show in 3rd grade, doing a dance to “The Right Stuff”. We wore matching neon spandex shorts, and t-shirts (that we’d puffy painted; remember puff paint?) tied off to the side in a knot.

40. If I had to pick only one food to eat for the rest of my life, it would be the potato. Is there any other food as versatile?

41. I could kick your tush in Boggle. Yes, that is a challenge.

42. In my earliest memory, I’m in nursery school, sitting in a sandbox that is filled with cornmeal instead of sand. There is a green bucket next to me.

43. I would love to edit/proofread for a living. Perhaps I will pursue this once my babies aren’t babies anymore.

44. I loathed seafood, until we went to Hawaii last year and I had, among other things, crab macadamia nut won tons. Oh. Yum.

45. My favorite color changes daily. Today it is turquoise.

46. I’m a hoarder. I can’t throw anything away without thinking, But wait, there’s a .00002% chance that I could use this bread bag for something someday!

47. When I was younger I preferred to sit and read a book rather than go outside and play. I still do.

48. I couldn’t sing on key to save my life.

47. I love how babies don’t mind what you sound like when you sing, they just adore being sung to.

48. I once spent more money on going to/being in a friend’s wedding than I spent ON MY OWN.

49. I never question authority figures. I HATE this about myself.

50. I have about a bazillion dollars in school debt. I have ZERO credit card debt.

51. I am a lover of all types of music, but most especially country, classic rock and those stations that claim to play “the best of the 80’s, 90’s and Today”.

52. I am TOTALLY afraid of heights. You will never find me mountain climbing, bungee jumping or sky diving. Ever.

53. The last thing I ate was half a bag of Sunchips.

54. No matter what mood I’m in, I can’t help but smile every time I hear my almost-three-year-old say, “You don’t know the power of the Dark Side!

54. I am watching my husband play Call of Duty while I type this.

55. I’m only a pound or two away from my prepregnant weight, yet I am about 2 or 3 sizes bigger than my prepregnant size. Someone explain that to me?

56. I am the most forgetful person you will ever meet. I would blame it on my children, except that I’ve been this way since… man… can’t really remember… A long time, believe me.

57. I steal my son’s fruit snacks.

58. I won The Smurfs on DVD a few weeks ago.

59. Every night I say I’m going to go to bed early and I NEVER DO.

60. My favorite guilty-pleasure snack: plain Lay’s potato chips dipped in cream cheese. Fat dipped in fat. Oh, yum.

61. I used to be able to tie a cherry stem in a knot in my mouth, no hands, around my tongue ring.

62. I learned to drive in an old Dodge Caravan. With wood paneling on the side. You know, the fancy kind of Dodge Caravan.

63. I am DEATHLY allergic to cats. Plus I just don’t like their attitudes.

64. I got married in Denmark; it was just Jeff, myself, and 3 random Danish guys. It’s also one of my best memories, and I wouldn’t change one single thing about it.

65. I can’t resist a sale. Old Navy is probably still in business thanks solely to my business.

66. When I was pregnant with Ethan, I got a post card in the mail that announced a baby product safety seminar being held in the conference room of a nearby hotel. I forced Jeff to go with me, though he protested the whole way, on account of the SHADINESS of the whole thing. Turns out, I was DUPED, big time. It was a guy trying desperately to sell Babee Tenda products to a room full of naive pregnant women. Jeff will never let me forget this.

67. I love to bake. In fact I’m about to go bake some cupcakes as soon as I come up with another 8 things…

68. I am a sucker for Lifetime movies.

69. I wish I had an accent. Accents are so cool.

70. I’m still afraid of thunder and lightning storms.

71. I love to read; I wish I had more time for reading. If I were given an extra hour in the day to use as I please, I’d spend half of it sleeping and half of it reading.

72. One of the first things Jeff did after we got married was force me to sit down and watch the Star Wars trilogy- I’d never seen any of them! He found that difficult to cope with and could not allow me to continue that way.

73. I took cello lessons in elementary school. I quit because the cello was a bajillion times the size of me and I got tired of dragging it around. Not because I sucked.

74. I can’t whistle.

75. My whole life I was always told to speak up. My voice was so quiet no one could EVER hear me. And then I had kids. Now I never stop yelling.

76. I worked at Cedar Point in Sandusky, Ohio, for two days. I went through the whole ordeal of packing up a summer’s worth of stuff, moved into the housing they have for employees, went to work ONCE and then quit at the end of the day. Packed my stuff up and drove back to Erie. My only excuse: it was food service. I’m so not strong enough to work in food service.

77. When I held Ethan for the first time, I was holding a baby for the first time.

78. I can’t breathe if the heat is on in the car. I literally feel like I’m suffocating and would rather freeze my fingers and toes off than drive with the heat on.

79. When I was in high school, my family lived all the way out on the very end of Presque Isle, a peninsula in Erie, PA. Nobody ever wanted to give me rides anywhere.

80. I once tried to teach a girl I knew from my Spanish class how to crochet while she was high. The lesson didn’t go too badly, considering. I think she even invented a few new stitches.

81. When I eat Lucky Charms (which I used to, a lot), I have to eat all the marshmallows first. Then I can eat the non-marshmallowey pieces. It’s almost like I’m eating two different bowls of cereal.

82. I went to Gannon University for one month and quit. I ended up taking a year off and then attended Penn State Behrend.

83. One time I dyed my light brown/dark blonde hair BLACK. It came out blackish with an all-over tint of green. I cried and dyed my hair twice more that night, trying to get my color back. It was gross.

84. I was a vegetarian for a year.

85. You know those infomercials for SMC, Ronco Showtime Rotisserie, Richard Simmons workouts, Video Professor, etc.? I used to work for a telemarketing company that took calls for all of these products, as well as tons of others. I worked the shift that began at 5:30am and it was AWFUL. Especially when the Foot Guy would call. He liked to talk about my (or whoever answered the phone; he didn’t discriminate) feet, what kind of shoes I was wearing, if I had socks on, if my nails were painted, what color, etc. I wonder why I didn’t make a career out of that job?

86. I announced my first pregnancy at my wedding renewal ceremony, a mere 4 months after my actual wedding. I love how tacky that almost was.

87. I can read and understand French fairly well. I suck at speaking it.

88. My favorite books growing up- there are two, it’s a tie, I just can’t choose between them: Matilda by Roald Dahl and The Phantom Tollbooth by Norton Juster. I have read them both probably 50 times.

89. One day in middle school, specifically, during lunch, more specifically, while I was chewing some barbeque potato chips (Wise brand, if you must know), my jaw locked up. It stayed that way, if I remember correctly, for a few days. It turns out I had TMJ. I got to miss school and drink lots of milkshakes.

90. I never saw E.T. until it was rereleased in theaters a few years ago.

91. I’ve never broken a single bone in my body.

92. Of all the places I’ve been, by far, the coolest was the Anne Frank House in Amsterdam. Just amazing.

93. I wish I knew how to tie a tie. I could learn, but I’m too lazy. I guess I don’t wish it too bad.

94. I’ve never held a gun.

95. A story my mom likes to tell people: When she took me to my kindergarten screening when I was like 4, they told me to write my name, so I did, in cursive. They were all shocked and amazed and I was all, What? You said write it, not print it. Punks.

96. I had a lisp up until like age 5 or so. Basically, way after it stopped being cute.

97. I used to like to play video games. I don’t anymore, probably because I have so little free time that it kind of seems like a waste of time. My husband, who has fond memories of us sitting around back when we were dating, playing Rainbow Six and eating Laffy Taffy, likes to tell people that he was duped, that I only told him I liked video games to get him to marry me.

98. I used to take ballet, tap and jazz lessons. I was no good.

99. I’ve only ever had one traffic ticket in my whole life: On my way to work one morning, running late (it was 5:30am and still dark out), I’d stopped at a light. It was a light that was on a timer, and there were NO CARS around for miles. I was running late, and after sitting there for what felt like FOREVER, I decided I was just gonna run the light. Nobody was around. So I went. And what do you know? There was someone around; a cop, sitting right behind me at the light, so close that his headlights were hidden. He gave me a ticket. I didn’t even try to get out of it because WHAT KIND OF IDIOT RUNS A LIGHT WITH A COP RIGHT BEHIND HER?

100. My “One Crazy Night in College…” story involves killing all the alcohol in the room, then proceeding to the Nittany Lion and, uh, well, we’ll just end the story there.

9 responses

13 02 2007

you forgot one. you rock. 🙂

14 02 2007
Mom A

you’re doing an awesome job.

16 02 2007

I was never laughing at you about “mitten” or “button”, rather laughing with you.

Besides, you have so many other things you’re good at; who cares about a few words you can not..

…It’s still funny though.

2 08 2007
Ruth Simons

hi…i like your blog…it’s the mom, cook, writing at naptime thing in me. you look great! i have three boys under 5…and am a new blogger. it is a great escape!

9 05 2008
Meaghan Hayden

Hi Caley,

I work with Whirlpool brand and wanted to share an upcoming contest with you that might be of interest to your readers. As the go-to source for moms, we believe many of your readers come to you for insight and solutions.

This Mother’s Day, May 11, Whirlpool brand will kick-off the fourth annual Mother of Invention Grant Program – just in time for the 100th anniversary of Mother’s Day. In the past three years, Whirlpool brand has recognized and helped more than 15 moms turn their innovative ideas into reality.

The Whirlpool brand Mother of Invention Grant Program provides seed money and expert guidance to moms to turn their invention, business or service ideas into full-fledged businesses.

Contest winners receive:

§ A $20,000 grant for the grand prize winner

§ $24,000 in grant money for the four runners-up

§ Appliance prizes

§ Invitation to business boot camp where winners will receive guidance from Whirlpool and industry experts

This year, we are greening the program by adding a new category focused on moms who create an environmentally friendly product/service or use natural/recycled materials to create their invention.

More information and entry forms can be found at http://www.whirlpool.com/moms beginning May 11. Entries are accepted through July 31, 2008.

Please let me know if you have any questions or would like additional information about the program.

21 05 2008
National Doodle Day Contest! « Persistent Illusion

[…] Update:  Apparently Caley of Sublime Bedlam is deathly afraid….of butterflies.  Yes, yes I do feel horrible.  Possibly related posts: […]

4 08 2008
Eric Willis

You *tagged* a bridge?! What were you thinking?


10 12 2008
They have razor wings! « Sublime Bedlam

[…] About Me […]

28 02 2009
Michael Tim

I love your site!

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