Backwards

12 05 2009

You know how they say

that “old people” are invading

social networking sites?

I just finished

a conversation with my mom.

Somehow

the topic of

Twitter

came up.

I mentioned

something about someone

to which she replied,

“Oh, yeah,

I knew that.

I follow him on Twitter.”

What the what?

Here are some things that I did not say:

I did not say,

“You know what Twitter is?”

Nor did I say,

“You tweet?”

Norther

(that is combo “nor” and “further”)

(yes, you can use it too, if you like;

it is a neat word)

did I say,

“You follow people?”

Norther did I question,

“Do you drop Twitter lingo

in conversation?”

I didn’t even ask

“How many followers do you have?”

“How many people do you follow?”

“Do you tweet often?

Are you one of those

who will post something random one day

and then not tweet again

for 3 months?

or

Are you more of the

“Now I’m eating lunch- turkey w/ cheese on rye, YUM.”

“Just went pee- we r out of TP!”

“What should I make for dinner tonight? Any 1 got any suggestions 4 me?”

type?”

No.

No no.

Instead,

I said,

“You have a Twitter account,

and yet

you aren’t following me?”


It’s like that time

I offered my umbrella

to a woman caught in the rain.

She declined.

And I was all,

What’s wrong with my umbrella,

wet lady???

Well,

What’s wrong with following me?

Her response was

basically

that she didn’t want

to be all up in my grill

and invade my space.

Uh huh.

Sure.

Riiight.

It was not until hours later

that it hit me.

Perhaps

she was not following me

because she didn’t want

me

to invade

her

space.

Perhaps

she didn’t want

me

all up in

her

grill.

Perhaps

I was never meant to find out

about her

secret

Twitter account.

Hmm.

Well

too bad.

I know now.

And now I’m following you.

And I will always know

exactly what

“secret”

things you are doing.

Follow

THAT…

Mom.


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3 responses

13 05 2009
Ethan's Oma

ur so funny !! trust me, u will be bored to death following me…..

13 05 2009
Ethan's Oma

ok, I clicked on your name yesterday to follow you, and then on Jeff’s…and your little icons were on my list of people I’m following…and then I looked at it today and Jeff DUMPED me !!!

15 05 2009
astarte

HA!!! My mother still refuses to get a COMPUTER, nevermind a Twitter account!!!

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