Second grade; Elusive balance

15 10 2008

My crazy is not a recently acquired thing. I have been crazy for years, see? This is me at 7 years old:

Nora and Alias Mother, good guesses! Alias Mother said I was probably that girl who looked like she had somewhere much better to be. And she was right; CLEARLY, I’d much rather have been off OVER THERE TO THE LEFT attending that fashion class. A purple dress! Blue tights! Perfection!

Aside from learning how not to dress, as well as the valuable lesson: “Never wear your hair in a French braid on Picture Day, unless you think Mop Head Hair is hip,” I was also learning how one falls in love. My teacher in the picture, Miss Tucker, bought fish for our class pet (we named them Tom & Jerry) (one day we came to class and found that Tom had eaten Jerry- it was TRAGIC) (someone had fed them Pizzerias, I think, so it’s a wonder they didn’t eat each other). The man who delivered them to our classroom, Jamie, later fell madly in love with Miss Tucker and married her, making her Miss Tucker-Pie. Movie directors, are you reading this? These are the things of which classic love stories are made!


At the rate Ethan is going, I’m not sure he’s going to make it to second grade. I’m pretty sure you have to not fear other people, and wiffle balls, and grass if you are to have any kind of educational career. Gym Jam began as kind of a savior for us (we were in desperate need of getting out of the house), but now I find myself dreading it each week. It’s part Ethan’s lack of social skills, part his naughty streak. And today, in particular, it was partly due to the fact that he was up at 5:20 with me, when I got up to feed Oliver. He’d already been awake nearly 5 hours by the time we got to class. And then the teacher HAD THE NERVE to ask him to hold the hand of another kid when they ran across the gym. He lost it, collapsing dramatically to the floor, thrashing around and screaming “noooo!” It was all, as they say, downhill from there. I made the decision after 10 more minutes of meltdown to leave class early, cheeks ablaze, dragging my screaming son along behind me, happy drooling Ollie on my hip, “FAILURE” written on my forehead.

I am increasingly feeling like I have no control over him. He is a good kid- he is HILARIOUS, he is kind and sweet, and so curious and intelligent. I couldn’t love him any more than I do. And I know 3-year-olds are not notorious for being well-behaved. But he can be so mean! Whenever I discipline him for something, he punches, he calls me all the mean names he can think of, he clenches his fists and growls- I could go on. It’s frustrating, and I feel like I’m shortchanging him when it comes to the attention and patience he needs. And whenever I manage to fit in extra Ethan time, I inevitably feel as though I’m neglecting Ollie. There is a balance, I know there is- I see a million other mothers reach it. But I haven’t yet.



9 responses

16 10 2008
Stephanie of Stopbouncing

At least your necklace matched your tights…

Isn’t it awful what our parents let us leave the house in when we were younger?!?

16 10 2008
Ethan's Oma

okay, in my defense, (since I’m the parent who let her leave the house) I thought I was being a cool Mom by letting her “express” herself, I mean, who says that blue and purple don’t match…..society ? No, I let my girls wear what they wanted. For a whole month she wore her “Madonna” outfit ! πŸ™‚

16 10 2008
Stephanie of Stopbouncing

Open mouth, insert foot.

16 10 2008
Ethan's Oma

Hey, it’s ok !! Didn’t you see the smiley face ?

16 10 2008
Stephanie of Stopbouncing

Oh, yes, just that sometimes I forget that moms/dads read the internets πŸ˜‰

(My parents did the same thing with me)

17 10 2008

I love being right. And I don’t think the blue/purple is so bad. I mean, you’ve got the blue beads to balance it all out…

17 10 2008

Ethan’s Oma, I think this would be a really great time to post pictures of Caley in the Madonna outfit.

17 10 2008
Ethan's Oma

hmmmm…..if only I could figure out how to do that…..I don’t know how I could access her blog and post something she didn’t approve of. πŸ™‚

20 10 2008
Comments, costumes, and a poll « Sublime Bedlam

[…] under Uncategorized   After the fight that broke out (kidding!) in the comments section of this post calmed down a bit, a request for photos of me dressed in my “Madonna outfit” was made. […]

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