Cold Turkey

29 10 2007

5 months, and Ethan is no closer now to being potty trained than he was back then. He still has yet to poop in the potty, and still only asks to go when the alternative is eating his dinner or being put down for bed/nap. And not only that, but he recently stopped telling me when he had gone poop in his diaper. You’d think that wouldn’t be such a big problem, because thanks to the fact that I have a nose that works, I’d just know. Call it Momtuition. But I’d know, and I’d take care of it. However, they don’t all stink to high heavens. Plus, I’m pregnant and my sense of smell is completely out of whack and not to be trusted.

So yesterday, after changing his (Surprise! Poopy!) diaper, that’d he’d been wearing for at least a little while (long enough to give him a mild diaper rash), I had had ENOUGH. If he can’t go in the potty, the LEAST he can do is tell me that he’s gone in his diaper, right? Right?? Apparently not.

I was fed up and determined that tomorrow (meaning today), there would be no diapers. So I finished changing him, and immediately headed out to buy some underpants. I’d already bought one package in the hopes that they’d motivate him, which THEY DID NOT. This time I bought three more. I bought enough that we’d be able to go cold turkey from the diapers, enough that he could have accident after accident today. And I explained to him that today he is going to act like a big boy, and no more wearing diapers. He had a hysterical screaming fit at a7am this morning as we donned the first pair of underpants.

It’s now 9:30am and we just changed into clean pair #4. Or maybe we’re on #5, I’m not sure; it’s all a blur of pee-soaked fabric. All I know is that he’s NOT GETTING IT. I tried making the transition a little easier a few months ago, putting him in Pull-ups during the day, but they did absolutely nothing. He still went in them just the same as with diapers. But those are more expensive than diapers, and, as you’d expect, don’t hold the accidents as well. My frustrated thinking yesterday was that underpants would make going in his pants a lot less… pleasurable? and therefore encourage him to use the potty instead.

But we are getting nowhere! I know it’s only been a few hours. But he is treating the underpants the same as a diaper. He’s not telling me that he needs to go, or even that he HAS gone. I have made going potty seem as outrageously Cool and Fun and Exciting as I possibly can. I’ve told him that if he feels like he has to go, just to yell out, “POTTY!” and that we’d runrunrun as fast as we can to the bathroom, in fact, we’ll make it a race! How cool is that? And he’ll get an M&M and a sticker and… Nada.

And to make matters worse, for some reason (the Universe is against me is the reason, I’m convinced) I have felt nauseous all morning. What the heck is up with that? I’m not 8 weeks pregnant, I’m 33! I want to just lie still and nibble on some saltines, but instead I’m dragging Ethan in and out of the bathroom every 10 minutes. I’m beginning to wonder if the 15 pairs of underpants I bought is even going to last us one day.  Sigh.

And we haven’t even had an accident of the poopy variety yet.

Is he just not ready?  What am I doing wrong???


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5 responses

29 10 2007
Swistle

Oh, potty training! So many opinions! I will add mine, as long as we all understand that I KNOW NOTHING. I’m winging it. But what I do is I wait until the child is about 3 years old, and then I start putting them in undies AFTER they poop (because poop accidents make me feel like I’m losing my mind), and then I make them sit on the potty every 15 minutes or every 30 minutes, or some other consistent amount of time. If they consistently wet their pants, I put them in diapers but make them sit on the potty every 15/30 minutes (to reduce stress and clean-up). Gradually the child starts to be in charge of when he goes potty. Then one day I realize, “Hey, this child is potty-trained!” The end.

29 10 2007
Caley

Swistle: I think the key word you used was “gradually.” I think maybe I was expecting too much out of him for our first diaper-free day…

29 10 2007
Transition-less « Sublime Bedlam

[…] training got off to a rather rocky start this morning (you may have caught my whining earlier). But I realized, after reading Swistle’s comment and after Jeff called to tell me […]

18 11 2007
retro

This year my wife decided to have a dry run thanksgiving day to test out her recipes. We soaked the bird in a brine solution she got at William Sonoma it really kept it moist. OMG, the turkey was so good and I get to do it again in a few days!

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