The island sun

4 04 2007

“You look really pretty. I don’t know if it’s the island sun or what, but…”


It was the island sun, Jeff. And the 7- count ’em, 7!- full nights’ sleep I got didn’t hurt, either. Hawaii was fun; we went surfing… well, we lounged on surf boards while waiting for the waves to show up, which they did not, if you can call that surfing… which you know I totally do, and WILL do every time I tell Ethan when he’s older about “that time your awesomely cool dad and I surfed some gnarly waves!”*

We went to a luau, where I was praised multiple times by the three guys we went with for NOT paying the extra $50 for the deluxe tickets; we really didn’t miss the pineapple centerpiece, the seating 10 feet closer to the stage, and the cool green sticker it would have bought us.

We went to a giant flea market where we got pounds and pounds of the reason I gained 3 bajillion pounds while on vacation (thank you, heavenly coconut macadamia nuts, honey roasted macadamia nuts, spicy hot macadamia nuts, chocolate and caramel macadamia nuts. I and my flabbynesses will never forget you…), t-shirts on sale 5 for $20, and some beautiful Hawaiian flowers, which I do not plan to plant myself, since they’re much prettier when they’re alive.

And we walked the strip along Waikiki a couple of times, where Jeff so generously decided** to go fishing*** for a pearl for me, which he then had set in the middle of three silver maile leaves with a diamond on the side. Alooo…HA! (I don’t know; the natives seemed to say that a lot.)

And now we’re back, and I’ve spent the last couple days trying and failing to get used to this timezone (for some reason I’m falling asleep on the couch at 8:30 to Buffy; I totally missed like all of Willow going evil 😦 ), and trying to get to know the rapskallion that my mom insists is Ethan, even though I’m pretty sure she sneakily switched him out with some other kid and took the real Ethan back to Erie with her.

Because seriously, when I left, yeah, he was no angel. But this kid? This kid will scream and wail because you’ve asked him to take a sip of milk. This kid will give you scowly disgusted faces if you so much as glance at him. This kid will throw his toys at your head on purpose, and then cry like you’re the one who whipped the car at him. And then the next moment, he’s giggling and dancing (which involves a deep squat while shaking his fists in the air- there is nothing cuter, I swear) before the tears have even had a chance to dry.

(I have to admit, though, that even though it seems like he’s all bad, he’s not. He has his good moments. He’s begun calling the mailman “me me”, which is adorable. He’ll hold one of his many toy cell phones up to his ear and walk around the house while “talking” to his “friends”… the other day he while talking to someone I heard him say “Eeugh? Bah? Eeugh? Ma ma? Eeeeugh.” And then he hung up. And he’s also recently discovered a love of toy cars. Like Matchbox type cars. Only we don’t have any of those, so he carries around a tiny Doc (is that his name? the blue old guy/car from Cars) that was free in a box of cereal, and a little toy fire truck that was a “free gift” from Reader’s Digest, that he’s convinced is a train. He is SUCH a little boy now!)



Maybe its the back and forth, constantly, all day long, with Ethan’s moods. Probably its my inability to get back on something relatively like a schedule. Most likely, its the fact that Hawaii stole my daily exercise, since instead of going for my 3 mile walk every day I was walking all of 75 steps down to the pool. To just… lie there. However, there’s an eensy weensy tiny little voice in my head that’s saying “…Or… you might be pregnant…” To that voice I say (in my usually-reserved-for-naughty-Ethan Stern Voice), “HUSH!” I know better than to get my hopes up, but still. That voice, much like Ethan, is totally pretending like it doesn’t hear me. Guess I’ll just have to wait and see… wait and see and worry and spend another small fortune on pregnancy tests…

But despite the fatigue and the rapskallion and the lack of palm trees and rainbows, it’s good to be back. As Jeff so eloquently put it, “I’m ‘aloha-ed’ out.”


*I can use words like “gnarly” now. Now that I am a surfer.

**By ‘decided’ I meant something like ‘was talked into’. The guys who were in Hawaii found out that I did a couple loads of laundry while we were there. They then jumped all over Jeff for making his wife do laundry. While on vacation. In Hawaii. And so they informed him that by Marital Law he was required to by me something sparkly and expensive.

***By ‘fishing’ I meant that he ‘scooped an oyster out of a bucket’. Much to the delight of the man working the little cart thingy, who was so happy to have duped someone into his “Pick a clam for only $15! $15 plus the multiple hundred dollar setting…” He was so giddy. I think he was even singing at one point.

(Sidenote: I bought a new pair of Reef’s (the best flip flops in the world EVER)before leaving, but it looks like I should have bought this pair… I wonder what it would be like to do Hawaii in a constantly slightly buzzed state? Next time.)



8 responses

4 04 2007

i do think i have a copy of an old law journal that discusses that marital law whereby the husband must compensate the wife two-fold for any outside duties performed while on vacation. let me check on that. 😉

4 04 2007

and you mispelled “buy.” you can delete this comment after you have fixed that, miss english major. 😀

4 04 2007

I would never misspell “by”- that was a mere typo. I typed that post on the laptop, which (as you know, you’ve used it) is so old that half the keys you hit don’t show up. I typed out the word “buy” but the “u” never showed up.

I even caught the typo when I was rereading the post after I hit ‘publish’ but when I went back to fix it, I forgot what I was looking for. If you notice, the timestamp on that post is after midnight, and I wasn’t thinking clearly due to fatigue.

You, however, misspelled “misspell”. Two s’s, not one.


Miss English Major

4 04 2007

ha. love it. :-*

4 04 2007
ethans oma

girls, girls, girls….let’s not pick at each other.

4 04 2007

1. I’m jealous of your trip- do you realize that now that you’re a surfer, you could hang out with Cameron Diaz and Matthew McConaughey?

2. As the owner of more flip flops than I have toes, I can say with relative certainty that you actually want these reefs:
…because they are the best. The ginger ones are pretty good too, although they don’t work for me because I have a permanent flip flop tan, and they wouldn’t cover it up
3. I am going to be joining the ranks of the unemployed at the end of next week (yay quitting my horrible job!), so we maybe I will come visit during the day some time – or you can come here on a field trip!

5 04 2007

The very first pair of Reefs I bought were the ones you linked to! And they were the ones that got me hooked. I wore those flip flops for years- I went river-walking in them, and wore them sightseeing in I don’t know how many countries in Europe. They are awesome, I agree.

I just thought it’d be interesting to spice things up with a shoe that holds alcohol in its sole. Even if they’re not as comfortable as the other Reefs, at least you can drink the pain of your blisters and sore feet away, right?

5 04 2007

I agree. It would be pretty cool to have combination flipflops/flask…PLUS they have a bottle opener in, so you can mix your alcohols for even more fun.

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